The Question

After every homeschooling parent has made the decision to homeschool their child the time comes when the inevitable happens.  You get the question.  "So?  What grade is your daughter/son in?".  This question may go directly to your child and, if you have a child like mine, you get shot a look with the I just ate a lemon face which is clearing telling you that you need to answer for them.  You then take a deep breathe and tell the person that you homeschool.  This statement can bring multiple responses.  Sometimes you get an excited, "good for you!" response. Sometimes you get an, "oh" and a confused stare.  Most times you just get more questions.  If you are in line at the grocery store talking to a perfect stranger the possibility for multiple questions is slim.  Other times you may find yourself seated next to someone  at a dinner and neither of you is going anywhere anytime soon.  This is when it can get interesting for any homeschooler.  I find that my method of homeschooling can bring on wider eyes and higher eyebrows than the more traditional school at home method.  I unschool.  I don't sit down with my kids every day and do school.  We go places and make things and just live a really full life. We take classes, read books and research topics we are interested in.   I googled  the definition of unschooling to give you a better idea of what it is and found this great quote by John Holt from his book "How Children Learn".   "Birds fly, fish swim, man thinks and learns. Therefore, we do not need to motivate children into learning by wheedling, bribing or bullying. We do not need to keep picking away at their minds to make sure they are learning. What we need to do, and all we need to do, is bring as much of the world as we can into the school and classroom (in our case, into their lives); give children as much help and guidance as they ask for; listen respectfully when they feel like talking; and then get out of the way. We can trust them to do the rest."  You can imagine the questions that come after I explain what unschooling is.  You may have some of your own. 
Actually defending homeschooling or unschooling never really bothers me.  I am really secure in my decision and I know it is not for everyone.  What makes me feel uncomfortable is talking about it with parents who have their kids in public school.  I feel like they think I am judging them.  I truly do understand that every child and family is different and that most every parent is doing what they think is best for their child.  Hey! Some of my best friends have their kids in public school! :) When you are so passionate about a subject like I am about unschooling it is hard to not sound judgemental.  A lot of the reasons I homeschool is because I think the public schools are doing a really poor job at preparing our children for the future.  It is hard to bring up these reasons when you are talking to a parent whose kid is in public school.
The more I do this unschooling thing the more I love it.  Every time I see my children figure something out on their own and get so much joy out of doing so I know that the husband and I are absolutely doing the right thing for our kids.  I really feel that this way is better for most kids than public school.  I wish the school system would  incorporate more of what Mr Holt suggests. I hope that by answering peoples questions I encourage others to give unschooling a try or to at least start questioning our current method used in the public schools.  I wish all my encounters could go like the one I had today.
 This morning my car broke down and went into the shop for an unspecified amount of time so I needed to rent a car.  A nice young lady from the car rental company came and  picked me up. She couldn't have been over twenty-five.  We were making conversation and somehow got on the topic of kids being on vacation from school and I told her that we homeschooled.  She asked some more questions and then I told her about unschooling.  Turns out her sister is going to school currently and just recently told her that she'd like to start a place where kids could come and learn just by life experiences and choose what they want to study.  "That's unschooling!" I exclaimed.  I gave her John Holts name and some other information. She said many times she couldn't wait to talk to her sister and tell her about this unschooling thing.  She even expressed how she wished she could have been unschooled instead of sitting in a desk all day.   Loved this encounter,  She was so excited and intrigued by what I told her.  It seemed to give her a sense of power and new energy.  I know that feeling.  I had it when I realized that learning is not something you do at school. It is not the ability to memorize facts and pass a test.  Learning is living.  You can't do one without the other.
As I'm writing this I'm realizing that I don't dread the question as much as I used to and in fact I kind of like it.  I am excited about what we are doing and I am happy to share that excitement with others.   Feel free to ask your questions!