Let me introduce myself

I'm a man of wealth and taste.

Ok - that is not me. After putting this off for I don't' know how long I've quit making excuses and I'm doing it. I'm blogging about my experience. My experience of being a homeschooling, stay at home, sorta hippy, live music loving, Mom to two kids. I've been hearing lately, being the last year, you should do a blog. You should do a blog about homeschooling. You should do a blog about the way you parent. You should, you should, you should. I'm not good with that. I have so many ideas and intentions but I am, excuse me, I used to be, such a procrastinator. I say I used to be because I believe in the law of attraction so if I keep saying I am I will be and I don't want to be so I can't. Got it?
I've been scripting these blog posts in my head for some time now. I sit in front of the TV with my glass of wine at 10:30 at night completely exhausted but not going to be because I just want to enjoy this mellow alone time without kids literallyscripting in my head what I want to be writing in my blog. For some reason tonight I went and grabbed the computer. My empty glass of wine is next to me, it is 11:53 and Jay Leno is on the TV although I'm not paying attention. Maybe it was the sappy episode of parenthood that motivated me or maybe I just need to think about things a REALLY LONG time before actually doing them. I don't know. I do know that I have a lot to say because I run a different script every night in my head. I don't know if anyone out there will find this helpful but I like getting this off my chest although I haven't written a diary of sorts for years I know it is good for me.
My husband just wandered out of the bedroom and told my to go to bed. "This is why your so tired!" Yea, I know. I just get that burst of energy late! Which is why I should go to bed at 10 but when your 3 year old doesn't go to bed until 8:45 you don't even realize it is late until you look at the clock at 10:45 and go shit, I should go to bed. But you don't because it just feels so good to just sit on the couch and be without anyone saying mommy, i need this or that!
Of course my husband had to interrupt my first entry.
Don't get me wrong I love him! He rocks! But he can totally call me out and I hate it when he is right! My theory is that I'm going through some kind of change/metamorphosis right now. Bigger and better things are coming and I'm in transition. Sounds good, no?

So I guess I was going to introduce myself so I should do that.
I'm 40. Just turned. This was a big deal to me. My celebration was AMAZING. I am feeling better than ever. I have people in my life that I adore and that I love being around and knowing.
I am a Mom. My kids are L, a girl who is 6 and H, a boy who is 3. They have changed everything about me. I am who I am because I have them.
I am a wife. My husband J, is 42. I met him in Alaska at the age of 24 last call at a bar. It amazes me somedays how perfect we are together. He is the one for me and I am a lucky women. And he is a lucky man. :)
I stay at home and I homeschool my kids. My youngest does go to preschool but only because it is a total hippy preschool and the school is the only reason I started homeschooling in the first place. Other than that I pretty much unschool both of my kids. I'll get more into what unschooling is later if I need to. Lets just say for now that we are very child led and we have a lot of fun.

As for the title of this blog. This is just what came to me tonight when setting this up but I think it fits. One of my favorite quotes I've heard is "the last time you know everything there is to raising kids is right before you have them". Nothing can prepare you! For that matter nothing can prepare you for what it will do to your marriage or your friendships. No one can explain it to you. I realized over time that most of my frustration lies in the fact that I have no idea what I am doing.

And now I must end this first post because my sweet daughter has had an accident so I'm going to take care of her and get her back to bed. By this time there is a great posibility that my son will be up looking for me or I will fall asleep in L's bed so I probably won't get back to this tonight and I really want to publish it. So, talk to you tomorrow!